Spike
u/SpikeShroom
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I am totally with you on showing everyone they were wrong. It would be amazing if it could happen like that. Though I gotta say, it only really works in your mind. The people who were underestimating you aren't worth your attention anymore. The next step is finding satisfaction within yourself. Like, there are people who went to high school and college with me that, no matter what, will always be more successful than me on paper. Despite how I feel, I won't actually be able to impress them. And that's okay. I'm just as worthy as them anyway, and so are you.
Plenty of people think of themselves as agender (identifying with not having a gender) or genderfluid (identifying with different genders at different times). Finding resources under those labels can help, but you don't need to identify with a label. You don't have to fit the binary of man-or-woman at all. It's definitely scary and confusing (it is for all of us), but it gets easier when you accept that it's okay to feel the way that you do, and that you still deserve respect, happiness, friendship, and love like everyone else.
I suggest trying to find a trans support group in your area, if possible. It can really help to get perspective on how others live true to themselves in the same place.
