Polosha77

*slides 10 dollars to Finland* Please shoot Donald Trump if he becomes president.

@Polosha77

*Finland slides the money back, holds up a sign saying "I don't take dollars*

@DarkMage7280 *Slides Finland 300 Euros* Is that enough for you to kill Prince Williams?

@NorthIreland *Finland takes the money, puts his feet up*

"You didn't kill him!"
"You asked me to kill Prince WilliamS."
"It was a typo!"
"Not my problem."
"Give me money back, then!"
"No."

@DarkMage7280 Would you like 400 Euros for killing Donald J. Trump, Jr.? Make sure you kill that orange Pomeranian on his head as well - it's only humane. (What do you mean it's his hair?!? Eh, kill it anyway. It might be an alien for all we know.)

@Polosha77 *slides money back* Hun, it's free.

Louisiana: *literally making gumbo in a huge vat you'd find in a factory*

Louisiana: "NO DON'T HIT HIM! HE'S THE REASON WHY I WAS SUCCESSFULLY FOUNDED IN THE FIRST PLACE!"
(Each time France tried colonizing Louisiana on their own, they failed miserably. Then they asked Germany for a bit of help, and then that attempt worked because the Germans sent there successfully set up farms. So, thank you Germany, for helping Louisiana exist.)

@Polosha77 Do you speak French there?

I got bored and this inspired me to make a thing involving the states:
Louisiana: "Hey everyone, I'd like y'all to meet my sister, Acadiana." (Acadiana is a cultural region in Louisiana, one that attributed a majority of the culture and traditions in Louisiana; they're the Creoles)
Acadiana: *can only speak Creole French and Creole Haitian* "Bonjou, langet manman-w."
Louisiana: *gasps loudly and covers Acadiana's mouth*

(Acadiana basically said "Sup, motherfuckers.")

@Polosha77
I would love to see a comic of the different states and our little regions.

@LittleD it could also include the territories (like Puerto RIco, Guam, etc)

@Polosha77
YESSSSSSS. We could even finally address the fact that Puerto Rico is getting royally screwed by US congress.

@LittleD Don't forget DC, which gets screwed just as bad!

You're right though. Puerto Rico should either be a state or its own country.

MAKE DC A STATE DAMMIT.

@LittleD reddit.com/r/stateball

Not quite the same, but pretty good.

@LittleD Check out /r/stateball, you might enjoy it.

@Polosha77 Let's be honest, the real reason we put up with you Louisiana Frenchies is because of all the delicious food you make :P

@txag70 Well if it wasn't for Louisiana, America would be a lot smaller, seeing as the Louisiana Purchase added more than double the amount of territory the US already had.
Also, World War 2 would have ended a lot differently if it weren't for us, seeing as the Higgins boats, the boats that made it possible to get tanks on the beach during D-Day, were designed, manufactured, tested, and mass-produced by Louisianians.

@Polosha77 It was a joke ;)

Plus, y'all gave us Louis Armstrong and the jazz age. Louisiana is great (minus the smell of refineries -- and LSU -- woof.)

@txag70
Bitch what did you say about the LSU?

@Polosha77 You heard me. We are gonna finally get y'all this year. Spell "Go" correctly! I WANT TIGER MEAT DAMMIT!

(Naw for real tho we'll find another way to lose, as is tradition)

Gig 'em Aggies! #8-4University

Israel: "A-America?!" *falls to knees and starts sobbing* "I THOUGHT WHAT WE HAD WAS SPECIAL!!!!"

The Netherlands actually came to Louisiana after Hurricane Katrina to give us advice on how to prevent floods like that from happening again.

When snow/hail/sleet falls in the Gulf Coast:
Florida: "The fuck is this white shit?"
Texas: "Oh hey, snow! I only get this in my most northern parts, and even there it's rare!"
Louisiana: *terrified face* "We must close all the roads."
(yeah, even if there's no ice on the roads, we still close them if there's even a centimeter of snow)

@Polosha77 I swear as soon as a single snowflake falls down there, everyone forgets how to drive.

@Polosha77 Michigan: "oh there's 12 feet of snow? maaaybe a day off, if the plows don't have enough time before schools start"

New York: *tries to learn Creole languages so he can understand Acadiana* "Hey Acadiana!" *clears throat* "Mèrdik estipid dégoutant nan yon jennès.... That means 'You are a wonderful person,' in Creole Haitian, right?"
Acadiana: *can only speak Creole languages but can understand English* "...." *doubles over, laughing so hard that it actually hurts*
(New York said, "Fucking shitty asshole of a whore.")

Meanwhile, in the south:
Louisiana: *chasing after England using her gun as a club (ran out of ammo)* "AAANNNNNND STAY OUT!!!!!"

@Polosha77 Yeah we get it you're from Louisiana

Fun Fact for people who don't live in America but are planning on going to places like New York City, New Orleans, etc on vacation:
Please tip 15%-20% of the total cost of your meal at any restaurant. I know it sounds like a lot, but the minimum wage in America is $7.25 an hour. Most waiters and waitresses make their almost all of their money off of tips. My sister (who's a waitress) tells me about tourists from places like Canada (where the minimum wage is actually something a person can live off of) who tip horribly by American standards. However, this one guy asked her what should he tip, and he gasped in shock and a bit of terror when she mentioned the minimum wage as why you should tip 15%-20%.

@Polosha77 complaining about the customers instead of complaining with the government or the bosses is exactly why this keeps on going.... oh, and bad choices becoming culture, that too.

@iota09 Well, for most people, a majority of their income comes from tips.
Keep in mind, we don't have free college and a lot servers are college students who are either going to have to deal with student loans or are already dealing with them.
Just have a little common curtesy for people in the service industry in America.

@Polosha77
Wait... That minimum wage does seem very low...

But tipping 15-20% is expected? Here it's normally 10% if service is really good. That said, we have very high minimum wage laws.

@AussiePengwin
Unfortunately, here it's legal to pay people below minimum wage if they get tips, so a large tip really does help.

@PickleChick
Oh, wow. It's illegal here either way, at least it seems like it.

@AussiePengwin Well, for some restaurants, people get such bad pay compared to their hours that most of their money comes from tips.

@Polosha77 actually even 15% is considered low for a tip and some americans tip up to 25%-30%

@Polosha77
Actually, tipped employees legally get a lower minimum wage of about 2.13 an hour if their tips reach $30 or more a month, tips go into filling out the rest of the 7.25, but obviously if they make less than that, the employer must match at least to the minimum.

Malta: *hasn't won a single medal ever* "Okay, this is where I'd put my Olympic medals and my Eurovision trophy iF I HAD ANY!!!!"

If there were SATW versions of the states:
Louisiana: *is chasing France* "WAIT FOR ME!!!! TAKE ME WITH YOU!!!! I CAN'T STAND AMERICA ANYMORE!!!! LET ME BE YOUR COLONY AGAIN!!!!"

@Polosha77 Well... Napoleon didn't have the right to sell the Louisiana to the US (because he was not emperor then and still needed the agreement of the parliament), so technically, the purchase was illegal in France. And I think Jefferson did not have the right to make the deal either without consulting the US parliament, so technically it was illegal in the US too. Not sure Louisiana could use the excuse to break free though, tiny France wouldn't dare to help them against America ^^

An other useless fact : this agreement also violated one treaty with spain stipulating that France could not cede Louisiana to a third party, I guess initially the clause targeted the UK, but selling Louisiana to the US turned out to be quite bad for spain too.

Louisiana: *throws a rock at King Europe with a note attached that reads, "That's what you get for not tipping 15-20% while eating here."*
(In the US, the minimum wage is $7.25 an hour. Most waiters and waitresses in New Orleans make almost all of their money off of tips. Word to the wise, if you tip less than 15-20% on your meal, you're considered an asshole)

@Polosha77, its very sad to hear how low the minimum wage is, iv also heard that 22 veterans commite suicide everyday, its like i have my doubt that most of Europe would mind to take care of them, especially if they heard of that number.

22 veterans every day is like 8.000 veterans every year its heartbreaking, tho it not my nationality its still lives, that have shielded the weak.

@Polosha77 A friend of mine is a server, and as he put it, "Man, I always try my best not to make snap judgements about anyone, but whenever a customer has any kind of European accent it immediately bums me the Hell out because I know I'm not getting tipped."

@LonghairedRedneck
Yeah, my sister (who's a server) once explained this to a European customer and he was just like "Dear God how- Is that even legal?!"

@Polosha77 Otherwise rare occasions that a foreigner asks something like that, I just tell 'em "Man, capitalism's a dirty game."

@LonghairedRedneck well I'm Danish and have been to the US several times, usually two weeks at a time, and the smallest tip I ever left was 25%.. #NotAllOfUs

Louisiana: *is the Australia of the United States when it comes to our native species, such as Wolf Spiders (they carry their babies on their backs, so if you step on the mom, tons of baby spiders spread everywhere), Water Moccasins (it's a type of venomous snake, not the shoe), Alligators, Nutrias, Mosquitoes, Wasps, and the Roaches* "Sure, the gators need to be fed anyways."

@Polosha77 Just like Florida, then.

@HistoryNerd Yes, but with less invasive species that could easily eat cats and/or small-to-medium-sized dogs.
I blame little shits of children sneaking baby versions of those animals back from family vacations so they could be their pets, who then panic when the animal gets too big and throw it over the fence of their backyard.

Coral Sea Islands: *in the distance, glaring at Australia while flipping him off* "SCREW YOU!!!!!!!!!!!"

(The Coral Sea Islands, aka The Gay and Lesbian Kingdom of the Coral Sea Islands, aka The Gay Kingdom of the Coral Sea, is a small little micronation off the coast of Australia. They founded themselves because the Australian Parliament banned Same-Sex marriage.)

@Polosha77
You do know that's basically a joke, right? The only buildings in the entire archipelago are weather stations.

@Ozmussen Most Micronations are jokes. Having a colorful flag and hoisting it above an abandoned oil rig does not a new nation create.

@PaxRomana no! Don't be so mean! Sealand is best land!

@AustralianWaters If that's the case then I'll be looking for Sealand's athletes in the next Olympic Games.

@PaxRomana just keep waiting

@Polosha77 Hey, America and England banned it first!!! We just, uh, haven't got around to un-banning it.

@OscarLeigh let's hope the plebicite goes through...

Louisiana: ".... My highest point is a hill that is 535 feet. I named it Driskill Mountain just because it sounded cooler that Driskill Hill."

@Polosha77 Denmark also named their hill as a mountain, "Himmelberg" or "Sky mountain" or something like that

@Baldikaldi01 #9444707          
Himmelbjerget

@Polosha77 to clarify for all the rest of the world 535 feet = 163 meters

I can speak French, German, English, a bit of Irish Gaelic, some Native American languages, and a bit of Vietnamese
GO LOUISIANA

@Polosha77 *looks at you from a cliff, a single tear falls down face*

The America one is only for the Mexico border. If someone goes into Louisiana illegally, we just let them in, give them beer, and learn their culture.

@Polosha77 I imagine the Canadian border is the same. I personally don't live near the Boundary Waters, but I imagine they do something similar

@Lord_Skata Pretty much

Louisiana: ".... France.... Please.... Please take me back.... I can't live with that idiot anymore...."

Louisiana: *is confused, for she just learned that she's not the drunkest state, she's not even in the top 10*

Brother Florida: "...." *is considering doing the border digging thing*
Florida: "...." *looks over Brother Florida's shoulder and sees what he's reading* ".... Bitch don't even think about it."
(Brother Florida represents the Liberal parts of the state, while Florida herself represents the Conservative parts of the state. Help Brother Florida.)

I'm confused. What's NATO?

@Polosha77
The North Atlantic Treaty Organization. It's something of a military alliance between America, England, France. Germany, Turkey, Italy, Canada and many other countries. Sweden and Finland aren't part of it. It's main goal is to increase military cooperation between the member states and counter Russian and such.

@Hamgip
thank you for informing me because the news over here doesn't cover that stuff for some reason

@Polosha77 addition to Hamgip's commebt: they organize the big peace missions to the middle east and such, and the soldiers that do that are referred to as 'the blue berets' for reasons you can see from the comic

@Wortel NATO forces aren't known as blue berets or blue helmets. UN forces are. Blue headwear are the marks of the UN or United Nations peace keeping missions and observer missions. The blue berets in this comic belongs to Sweden, who isn't a part of NATO and therefore not a part of most of NATOs missions. When NATO takes part in a peace keeping operation it is most usually under UN jurisdiction and directives. Therefore sometimes blue hats on NATO as well. I am certain the berets in the above comic are blue simply because Sweden has a blue flag, though Sweden's blue berets are their helicopter flotilla, so these could be air cav,

@Torbk woooooops

@Wortel thank you for the information because no one on the news talks about it over here

@Polosha77 you're welcome

*looks at the "Golden Gay Time" ice cream*
.... This cannot be a coincidence....

@Polosha77 So let's have a Golden Gay Time while "playing" Slikpik?

@Tjalve
Have fun in the desert.

Louisiana: "What the fuck is this.... 'Snoflayk'.... Stuff that you speak of?"

@Polosha77 Jakarta : I think it's that thing... *points to an ice cream vendor*

@satwnhetafangirl
Louisiana: "Ohhhh! That makes sense now!"

@Polosha77 Jakarta : Yeah, I wonder why Denmark is scared of it though!

@satwnhetafangirl
Louisiana: "Maybe the cold's finally got to them."

@Polosha77 We banned that wintry dandruff stuff in the Bay Area to the higher altitudes, where it won't bother us on the coast.

Louisiana: ".... I don't get it...."
(Louisiana has an annual naked bike race and there are often naked people in the French Quarter during Mardi Gras.... This is nothing....)

How do French people generally feel about the US state of Louisiana(since it did originally belong to them)

@Polosha77

A heck of a lot more than that. The Louisiana Purchase was much more than just modern Louisiana, you know.

@Dan .... They probably think they should have sold the Louisiana Territory for more money....

@Polosha77 most of us don't think about it that much x)
Personally i consider Louisiana a bit like a island of perfection in the middle of... well... you know... murican, british....rosbeef xP

More seriously, like evry other ex-colony, or french related minority so with sympathie i guess

(sorry for the late answer)

'@aure'_d
Lousiana is pretty firmly entrenched in the Deep South even with the Cajun culture and Catholicism. Meaning all the things one associates with the Deep South? True there too. Perfection ain't exactly the word I'd use lol.

Also do French people really think of white Americans as being English? That seems very badly outdated.
Granted not exactly super inaccurate for the white lowland South around Lousiana...though those folks are the most Old World out of touch the country probably has short of the mountain Scots.

@sagas let me explain you... Frensh humour is a bit unique... our speciality is to exagerate evrything and we just love using ethnic cliché. So if you ask use belgian are slitly fat man eating fries, english very white people with red chick drinking tea and planning to invade the world, german very fat people eating choucroute and planing to... well... invade the world...
And americans are part english, part french who refuse their origin and try to control the world will eating too much bad food (wich is clearly a mix beatween the english bad taste and the french love of food). But we don't know were you could possibly have taken your bad knowledge of other language, your tendancie to feel superior and your use of bad excuse to mess with other people affair... really... no idea...
scotland : i kind of have an idea
polland ; funny, me too
france : shut up you two

@aure_d It's okay.
Also, thanks for the little compliment of my state.

Israel: "...." *leans over to Denmark* "Psst.... Iran most likely has nukes.... Just saying...."

Louisiana: "I don't know him. In fact, I have way more European roots than him." *sweating nervously*

Louisiana: *is secretly practicing voodoo*

@Polosha77 NO! BAD LOUISIANA! NO! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED IN HERE!

@Koshee
Louisiana: *hisses*

@Polosha77 Stop it you bloody boot.

@Koshee
Louisiana: "No! Never!"

@Polosha77 I'll throw you in the bloody gulf of Mexico!

@Koshee
Louisiana: "Screw you!" *flips you off*

What is a hokey? Is it that sport that they play on that water that somehow became solid? (I'm live in Louisiana and it feels like I'm melting whenever I go outside at this time of the year)

@Polosha77 Yes, you play hockey on ice. And they usually play it indoors so they can keep the place cold and have the ice not melt